B parties

Mr. L is going to be in yet another wedding next month (Seriously, I've lost count of how many he has been in - to my 2, both my mom's. And yes, I'm totally jealous of him, especially since he doesn't enjoy it the way I would!), and the guys had the bachelor party this Saturday. They took off up to DC for the night. The plan was dinner at Ruth's Chris and then a cigar bar. In reality, the cigar bar was also followed by a pub, before returning to the hotel and crashing. On the way back, they had lunch. That's it! All in all, totally un-scandalous.

Now, the last bachelor party he went to (earlier this year) was a long weekend in Vegas, and involved not only strip joints, but also regular clubs, and just happening into the club where Flo Rida was performing. And that's just the stuff that they would tell me about!

The one and only bachelorette party that I've been part of was pretty tame (and really fun). We went to Charleston, SC and stayed with a friend's family. We took a guided carriage ride, and had one of our other engaged friends try on dresses for our entertainment at a local bridal boutique, and walked all over Charleston, and spent one night out at the bars (but didn't do anything more scandalous than shots... looking back through the pictures, more shots than I remember). We even decorated foam tiaras! (Oh... and we had so much good food!)Basically, we were tame.

Private carriage ride - totally worth it (even in the cold!)

It is possible that her parents will never invite me back once they realize the way I tortured Cindy Lou Who in an attempt to get a picture of her in my tiara.

OK, we did give her cards with descriptions of types of people she had to find, and we made her wear a tiara, and she danced with the band for a bit, and there may have been a drunken rendition of the UVA fight song... but really, that was the only scandalousness!

Yes, they invited all the bachelorettes in the club to get up with the band - including the woman who had just gotten married and was still in her dress.

All of this makes me wonder what our parties will be like. Chris complained that this cigar bar trip was a little on the dull side (but admitted that the Ruth's Chris steak was the best he'd had in a very long time). I think he thinks that adult entertainment is essential to a bachelor party. And I loved my Charleston trip, but I have always imagined a slightly more scandalous party, with everyone really letting lose and maybe even dancing on a bar or two. Does that make us wild?

I recently spent the weekend in DC with some undergrad friends, and had a great time. The girl I was with is definitely on the wilder end of my friend spectrum (which really isn't that wild), and I told her that she was in charge of the bachelorette party. And I stand by that! I think she's a lot more likely to push and cheer lead to make me (us) have fun! And she's another future lawyer, so you know you can trust her to be very thorough and organized about the whole thing!

Monogram/Theme

I go back and forth. Some days I think that having a little bit of a legal-edged theme would be fun (we are both lawyers, as are most of our friends), and other days, I think it would be too much - even a little silly. Well, today is one of those days when I indulge myself. With Microsoft paint.

So here's my super-simple mock-up of my only-if-every-swears-it-isn't-crazy legal monogram. Of course, someone would have to clean it up and make it look pretty, but his is basically what's been suck in my head for a while now. Maybe now that I've let it out, it'll stop tormenting me.

heady

I admit it. I have a hat problem. I have nearly as many hats as I have pairs of shoes (and I love shoes too!), and I probably have more hats than purses! I love hats, I love the way I look in hats, and I love the drama of hats! unfortunately, there are not nearly enough excuses to don a bit of head adornment. But on a girl's wedding day, anything goes!

Cocktail parties call for cocktail hats!

Halloween 2008 - a lollipop tiara AND an awesome wig! And yes, those are amazing, glittery false eyelashes - another favorite that will reappear in some form for the wedding(minus the glitter, I suppose)!

Halloween 2007 - giant hat, and false eyelashes (again)

Horse Races - Is there any better excuse to wear a big hat?!

Another great horse race = another great hat!

I originally thought that I'd go with a traditional, long veil for the ceremony, and then a birdcage veil (easier to dance in, but even more dramatic) for the reception. Then it occurred to me - this is the perfect excuse to wear a hat! I still like the idea of a very traditional, long veil for the ceremony, but what about a birdcage veil WITH a hat for the reception!? Obviously, it couldn't be too high of a hat, because I still have to be able to twirl under an arm without knocking it off (these are serious considerations, people!), but a nice, understated hat - something like a fascinator+. Yeah, that's it. I really love my black cocktail hat - I wonder what something like that would look like in white?

from walkermillinery.com

Sunday Organization

I had a lazy weekend, and a long to-do list. So, of course, I worked on the things that didn't really need to be done urgently - like organizing my wedding research thus far into a spreadsheet! There is something incredibly comforting about a spreadsheet. I like having everything in one place, with neat rows and columns, all lined up with numbers in the same place, where they are easy to compare, AND easy to find again!

Now, thanks to the magic of googledocs, I can check it and update it at work or at home. No more sticky notes!!!

Warning: Goo ahead

Mr. L is coming to my family's for Thanksgiving with me this year. I'm so excited. It's extra wonderful because this is the first year that my mom has been the hostess for Thanksgiving! I honestly can't wait to have a long weekend with people I love, and to help out with Thanksgiving dinner. Hopefully, some time soon, I'll be settled down and in a house, I'll be able to play hostess. I can't wait to have people come to me!

photographers

I totally buy into the need for an amazing photographer. I have an awful memory, and it's even worse when I'm emotionally excited, and I'm terrified that I won't be able to remember all the special details, or I'll miss that sweet expression on my grandmother's face if I don't have an amazing photographer to capture it. An honestly, I'm a little narcissitic. There were several years in middle school-high school when I was extra camera shy, so there is honestly no photographic evidence that I even existed for most of the 90's. And I don't like that. I like a record of my existence (and I'd prefer if it's a record that glosses over my lumpier parts, and my awkward stances actually, I like the bizarro poses).

Scott Hayne is one of those amazing photographers. He's based out of Norfolk, VA, and is kind enough to keep a blog to show off some of his amazing images. I've killed entirely too much time drooling over them since I discovered him this afternoon. And I'll keep drooling until I see the price list, I'm sure. A knottie used them and recommended them, and I'm just so impressed.

floral arrangements

In keeping with the blue and white theme, I'm tempted to go with blue and white china vases for the flowers. I'm still partial to hydrangeas, but considering some sort of white flowers too. So here are the basic ideas:

Blue hydrangeas in plain, white vessels. Something clean and low, and simply elegant.

Something delicate and white, with just a touch of dainty blue - evoking a colonial feeling, perhaps. I especially like this for a historic venue.

Or my latest "oooooh" moment. An almost oriental vase, white with tons of beautiful deep blue patterning, overflowing with a single type of bloom - probably sticking with white flowers to keep it from getting too busy. I feel like this looks the most elegant (but that might just be because I love the feel of this inspiration photo!).

I'm it!

I've been tagged by the awesome Sezzy, of Suffering Love, who is in the same pre-engagement situation as I am. I'm way flattered that she

Here are the rules:
1) Link back to the fabulousness that tagged you and list the rules on your blog;
2) Spill 7 random facts about yourself;
3) Tag others, cause that's how the game of tag works (only I'm too shy to do this);
4) Comment to let them know they've been tagged.

Wow, seven whole things about me that I probably should not put on the internet:

1) When I was little, I was in an Oscar Meyer Wiener commercial. I was just one in one of many groups, and was probably only on tv for 2-3 words of the jingle, but I sang my heart out. More importantly, they gave me a giant blow-up OM wiener! I loved that thing, and took it to the pool almost every day for at least one summer, and was uber-skilled at jumping into the pool while 'riding' it. This sounds a little pervy now, but I was young and it was just cool to me then! I still remember how upset I was when I took it to the beach and some shells in the sand punctured it.

Ah, memories. This looks just like mine! I wonder if my mom has a hidden picture of mine somewhere.

2) In law school, I'd only use green bic highlighters. I would buy them in bulk at Staples. And I did actually use each one until it had no ink left. I thought they were the best color by leaps and bounds (and I still do). Green is light enough that you can easily read through it, and dark enough that I could write actual words in it and read them without squinting.

3) I hated my nickname growing up, and finally pitched enough full-blown, only-child tantrums about it that my entire family completely stopped using it. Now, I kinda like it, and wish that I had a nickname in the family. But that ship has sailed, and I was the one navigating.

4a) I was a college drop-out. I graduated high school at 17, and had no idea what I wanted. I tried college, but was incredibly unmotivated, and ended up dropping out/failing out. Yuck! So I moved in with my boyfriend-at-the-time, and worked low-wage jobs. Although he was by no means the reason that I was so directionless then, breaking up with him has become completely connected with getting my life together in my memories. When I left him (because he was cheating on me), I went home, went back to school, and was focused. I graduated 2.5 years later with my B.A., and three years after that, I graduated from a top 25 law school (and yeah, I'm proud of that).

4b) I was a ballroom dance instructor. After I dropped out of undergrad, I was looking for a job, and totally tumbled into a position at a local Fred Astaire studio. I walked in with no experience, and they trained me. I was actually pretty good (but no where near ready for any national pro competitions). I had several students who won local and regional competitions though. I actually really loved it, but the co-workers can be pretty shady, and the costs (of costumes, shoes, etc.) far outweigh the money you make.

Sadly, this is about the only picture I have of me dancing.

5) I can't dance. Not freestyle, out at the club dancing. Seriously. It's BAD. the fiance (then boyfriend) of a friend once videoed us dancing at a law school event. After I saw it, I swore I'd never dance in public without a partner again. That lasted about 6 months. I just enjoy dancing too much! I dance around my apartment. I dance in the car. And when I think no one is looking too closely, I even dance on the treadmill. A few weeks ago, I did a mirror maze, and I danced the entire way through that (and then through a game of mini golf).

6) Pump It is on my ipod workout mix. And every time it comes on, I want to box. As in, while I'm running on the treadmill, I really want to punch the air in front of me - usually just a basic jab, but sometimes an uppercut or hook. And usually, I let myself. I try to conceal it as just runner arms (you know, bent at the elbow, swinging back and forth in opposition to my legs), but there are loose fists, and there is some extra ooomph coming forward. And sometimes, when I'm in the car, I'll punch to the music to keep awake (but, of course, I'm careful not to punch the windshield... hard).

Maybe if I did more punching, I'd look like this. ...or not.

7) I love to climb things! I don't think a vacation is complete without climbing something - trails, rocks, sculptures, trees, signs... whatever is nearby. I have tons of pictures of me in trees. And I think that's awesome! (And I wear flip flops whenever possible. This means that I do a lot of climbing in flip flops. And I think that's awesome too).

Notice the Rainbow sandals on my feet here.

reception flip flops

I love the idea of having slippers for wedding guests to slip into at the reception. I don't imagine that cozy bedroom slippers or particularly nice flip flops will fit in my budget. we do have a collective 6 years of law school to pay off, after all. So I've been looking into some more affordable alternatives.

First, I saw this pattern for paper slippers on foldingtrees! Way too cute, and I could use any paper and perfectly match the wedding. Too cute! But I wonder how well they would adapt to a variety of foot sizes. Hrm. And can you imagine all the time I would have to spend folding?! I imagine that they most cost effective way would be to buy paper in rolls, but I wonder what it would really work out to be? And would people slip on the dance floor if they were wearing paper slippers? (But they are WAY cute!)

Then I thought about the little slippers that they give you at the pedicurist. They come in a variety of colors and are slightly more substantial, and I wouldn't have to worry about sizes - they are intended to be one size fits all.

And they're only $.33 - that's a big point in their favor. But I worry that they are too obviously cheap. And that people won't slip into them because a) the flimsiness will make them uncomfortable, b) women wearing hose won't want to deal with the toe thong, c) they won't be obviously noticeable, or d) people just won't have a problem with dance barefoot/sock footed.

So, in the end, is it worth doing half-way, or should I just commit to full fledged flip flops or nothing?

The talk

I am very fortunate to have a best friend who comes with a great family! I love them as if they were my own. They have access to the Americas Mart in Atlanta because of their business (which is an awesome story of small business success!), and they have used this access to buy wholesale jewelry before. We'd discussed the idea of my future husband taking advantage of this access too (so that I could end up with a larger ring for the same price, of course), but always in the abstract, along many years of relationships of varying degrees.

Now that it looks like it will really happen, my friend brought it up again, and her parents said that they'd be happy to help us get access to the Mart. Now, the next show isn't until January (OMG, that requires patience), and I had to actually broach the subject. In general, I think we can talk about anything, but he's avoided talking directly about this sort of thing, so I've been trying to dance around it (not that he would agree with this statement - he'd likely say that I've been very blunt and confrontational). But for him to know that this was an option, I had to actually bring it up myself. I was terrified!

But I did finally bring it up. I tried once and backed down, but the second time, I actually made myself say it out loud. And he responded perfectly. He asked a few questions to make sure that he understood what I was really talking about/offering up, and then said he'd think about it as a possibility. So, I'm stuck still guessing (for all I know, he may have already bought it - he did have all day Tuesday off) if and when and how. Which, honestly, I kinda like (although it is driving me a little crazy). And lets me relax too. I can tell myself that it's probably not going to happen yet, because he's probably waiting to get the ring that way. So it's win/win (at least for me).

ribbons make me happy

I recently discovered the Wish Special Events blog, and it is a wonderful resource, especially for weddings around the DC area. They have everything from venue reviews to tips on the cheapest place to rent chairs, to, most recently, info on secret (at least from me) ribbon outlets! Purr. I want to take a trip to buy ribbon now. Unfortunately, I probably need to do something about my current (excessive) ribbon stash first.

My other favorite ribbon source? The J. Crew outlet in Lynchburg, VA. One weekend each month (pretty much), they have an even bigger sale (as in, shoes in the catalogue are $200, in the outlet are $70, and at the outlet sale are $7) that's held in the actual warehouse, and it's a mad house! But there are also amazing deals to be had, and they actually sell their ribbon (like, the ribbon used for belts or flip flops). It's in giant bolts (at least for ribbon), and it's way cheap! I love it! But... this is part of the reason that I now have way too much ribbon.

STD postcards

Warning: math ahead.

I really want to do STD magnet postcards. I imagine a postcard that's a magnet - STD info on the front, and a mailing label stuck right to the magnet on the back. And according to the USPS hot line (yes, I called), they do still only require 27 cent postage. Rock! They'll be amazing!

So, I've been checking out the usual online culprits for cheap printing, and it looks like vistaprint comes through with the cheapest on this one - for 100 (I have no idea how many I'll need, but this seemed like a fair estimate for price comparison's sake), it's only $49.99 for regular postcard sized magnets (that's .50 each, for those of you who are as math challenged as I am - I double checked on the calculator). (Plus $4.95 to upload the image.)

However, if I do a STD magnet that's business card sized, and rubber cement it to a postcard, that may end up cheaper (although that makes me wonder even more about the postage changing - USPS is sneaky!). I can get the magnet from vistaprint for 17 cent/each (assuming 100 again), and the postcards themselves (or really, regular 3.5x5 prints) from adoramapix for 15 cent/each (or $.19 for matte instead of glossy, which may be worth the upgrade) - that brings the new (kinder, gentler) total to $.32-.36 per postcard (+rubber cement and mailing labels, and time to assemble).

Here's the easy summary:

big magnets: $.50/each
little magnets attached to postcard-sized prints: $.32-.36/each

So what to do?! Still assuming 100 STDs needed, that's a difference of only about $14-$18. So really, not enough of a price difference to really lose sleep over. And the bigger ones would be easier and look more like they were intended to be postcards (because they were)... and be less likely to fall apart in the mail. But would people prefer the smaller magnet?

the ring (only not really)

I love the idea of planning a wedding as much as the next girl (maybe more) - I totally fantasize and love looking at others' weddings for inspiration, and I absolutely file things in mental categories of love, like hate. I even have a general idea of the mood I want. And while I appreciate the beauty in many dresses and ring, I have never had that aha moment where I see a wedding dress or a ring that I love above all others. I ooh and ahh over them, but none have said "I am the one for you". Until last week.

There is a billboard that I pass on my way to work everyday. They recently put up a new sign on it for a jewelry store, and it's basically just a picture of one ring. The ring (to rule them all, and in the darkness bind them). My heart skipped a beat when I saw it.

And honestly, there's not even anything particularly outstanding about it. I'm sure I've seen essentially the same ring before without the heart palpitations and nearly careening into the car in front of me. (Although the billboard photo was straight-on of the side, and I think that makes the tiny side stone stand out more, and generally makes it all more dramatic.) Part of it was that the billboard proudly proclaimed that this ring was called "the Crown" (and who doesn't like that!?), but after a google search to try to find another picture of it, I realized that there are lots of engagement ring settings called some variation of crown, and none of them made me melt like this. Basically, I can't explain my obsession.

And my first thought (after I regained my ability to think), was that this was awful! I'm not planning to pick out a ring with him (I imagine that he would prefer to surprise me, and I completely trust his judgment), and I half expect him to pick out an estate ring, rather than something new (which I am completely on board with). So the chances of me actually getting the ring that caused me to melt are slim to none.

But after a moment, I realized that what this really meant was that I'd get to have two separate time-stopping ring experiences. I know that no matter what ring he picks out, it will make my heart skip a beat too, because it be so much more than a piece of jewelry. It reminded me how much I want that surprise, and I know that my heart will go aflutter every time I look at my hand and see the ring that came from him, and that the Scott Kay setting will stop inducing butterflies as soon as I have a ring of my own.

Getaway dress!

What a cute dress for leaving on the honeymoon or a bridesmaid luncheon... or even for the rehearsal dinner. I think it's uber-cute!

And right now, the price goes down even more (to $76) with code FANDF at checkout!* Sadly, there is no way for me to justify making wedding-related purchases yet (other than manicures - just in case).

*Thank you, shop it to me sale emails.

visions of navy and white

I'm pretty much set on a navy and white (possibly with some other accent color in the flowers, like a lime green) color scheme. Of course, this is subject to change if I can't have my late summer wedding. I don't think I'd really like navy in the spring. (I imagine I'm going to cling to my dream of a September wedding until it becomes silly - I may give up if I still don't have a ring in mid-January).

And now I've found the most beautiful dress ever! I want this for my BMs!Never mind that it was a one-of-a-kind vintage dress that is now sold. It's beauuuuuuuuuutiful. And I adore the stripes! I really want almost nautical stripes!

I'm already imagining it with a cute little bolero to cover their shoulders (if they want). Sigh.

Organization

I admit it; I bought a Wedding planner. I was too ashamed to buy a full-fledged, made-for-it wedding planner. Instead, I came home with a cute binder and some tabbed dividers. Sure, this won't guide me through the timeline/budget/whatever it is that the "wedding" planners do, but then, do I really need the encouragement?!

Basically, I just wanted to have one place (other than the stack of papers with my bills, etc.) to place all of the lists and such that I'm finding. I hate duplicating my own efforts!

The tension builds

He dropped a hint that he was actually looking at rings last week. And at first, it really was a complete relief. It made me a little excited that it might be happening soon, but my more rational side understood that he is not one to move quickly. I was actually content just to know that we were on the same page. I was zen.

And then nothing happened this weekend. But I was still pretty zen. And then I got an email from him this morning in which he was fantasizing about us actually being in the same city... and part of this fantasy was that I could move back in with an (amazing and perfect) old roomie. Mind you, I can't move until next September because of my work situation. In my mind, I would be getting married then, and moving into a house with him.

His email completely killed me! I know I'm being way emotional, but I read that to mean that he doesn't really want to marry me ever! I was/am devastated. Sure, it probably just means he doesn't want to rush. And sure, that's probably a good thing. But really, I just want to curl up in a ball and cry. And I can't even blame hormones.

So right now, I don't want to think about planning or pretty dresses. I just want to kick him. And that's not very nice.